While many would consider our family large, by itself, there were only rare occasions when it was just our family in the living room or around the dinner tables. Whether it was family nights with one of my gourmet meals and life questions, games of scrabble or monopoly, or just times when we loved on, laughed at or poked fun at each other, we were always adding something to each other’s life. Because of those times, you will never be the same. You will be more than what you would be by yourself. On winter days, these are the times that keep us warm inside when the weather was not quite as hospitable. I know your mom and I did our best to leave something meaningful for you to take away and think about. I hope we accomplished that, for your sake.
One of the reasons we enjoyed having your friends over was not just to meet them, but to share the joy of our family culture and provide them with something a little different than they might be use to. In the Bible it is called “refreshing others.” You may not know it, but God says there is a reward for this. In Proverbs 11:25 it says: “A generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed”. Paul even names people who did this in 1Corinthians 16:17-18 (NIV): “I was glad when Stephanas, Fortunatus and Achaicus arrived, because they have supplied what was lacking from you. For they refreshed my spirit and yours also. Such men deserve recognition.” The purpose in having your friends over was not to win brownie points with God, it was to invest in each of your lives, including your friends. Those times refreshed us, became a blessing to us and hopefully to you and your friends.
It is my hope that you will take this mindset and make it a part of your family’s heritage, too. Your approach doesn’t need to be exactly what we have done – make it your own, but make a resolution to do it with friends. It doesn’t matter what your house looks like. What matters is the warmth of the home which others find when they cross the threshold from the weather outside. Offer your friends and spiritual relatives a part of your heart. Show them what God fashioned so that He can enrich their lives through your love. You know there are only a few things you can invest in that will bring long-term rewards. Investing in People and God’s Kingdom are the only way you can be sure there will be any dividends, now or later.
While I feel you know this, I must say it anyway. Sharing yourself and being transparent with your friends is what God asks us to do. However, not everyone will return the favor or respond positively. Some people’s mindset, background and upbringing may have produced as limited ability for closeness and intimacy. That is not your concern. Your responsibility is to love others through your hospitality and sow the seeds. While I agree with Benjamin Franklin’s quote: “Friends should be few and well chosen,” you have to be open and willing to take a hit once in a while to find out who your real friends are. Who cannot use another good friend? If you haven’t made a resolution to find one, this is the perfect time. Your next invitation may be the one that builds a lifelong and/or eternal bond.
Love Dad