I pulled up the PTO form on the company’s intranet site and began filling it out. The US National Championships dates are set and our ministry’s competition team seems ready. As I look at each line, it becomes apparent that I am struggling more this year than in the previous years. It has been three years since the family experienced a vacation together. This year, as before, a significant portion of my vacation time will be for ministry instead of family vacation. I realize after a few minutes that my mind has drifted and taken me back to times when you were younger. I recall the turquoise water under the long bridges we drove heading for the Keys several years. Then there were the waterfalls, eye of the needle and lava flows of Hawaii. One of our favorites had to be the trips to the majestic mountains, rock formations and forests of New Mexico, Colorado, Wyoming, Montana and Western Canada. My heart yearns for one more trip with all of you together again.
The reality is that our family is scattered all over the world now. Those of you still here in Jacksonville lead active and full lives. Each of you has your own focus and priorities, as you should. I feel grateful for those of you who show up on Wednesday nights to share family night with us. While we rarely have a specific agenda, just being together makes it all worthwhile. Oh and how I treasure Thanksgiving. I’m not sure what I would do if we did not have that week to ten days together. I know you make that sacrifice for me, and I appreciate it more than I can say.
However, I want you to know what a struggle it is to make decisions like the one I must make today. My mind and heart wants to have you all close to me all the time, however, that is not reality. Each of you is suppose to leave home and have your own families and agendas. I have been called, in addition to my profession, to work in a ministry God saw fit to bless me with. I marvel at this, but even more that He allows me to have some balance in life. Christ plainly states that some will actually have to walk away from their families for their calling (Matthew 19:27 – 30.) While this is scripturally justified, I know it could not be an easy choice for anyone who loves God and his/her family. I personally don’t see how the disciples like Peter, could leave their families alone and without support for the long periods of time they did. I guess that is why God called them, instead of me. Being willing to leave the family for ministry is more difficult than I can imagine.
Kids, I think out loud like this because you may feel, at times, that I do spend a lot of time away from you while involved in ministry. I want you to know that if you are called, you may have to give up more than I have. If Christ says you are justified in leaving everything for His objective, there is a purpose beyond your vision and understanding. And, if outside your periphery, then the reward will also be outside of your understanding. Keep it in perspective so the long term priority takes precedence in your thoughts. I know it’s hard to think that way at times, but it will always be a better choice – especially those who are blessed through your calling, whatever it might be.
Love Dad