Today, I am getting ready to take Tracy to Orlando so she can spend some time in England and Scotland with Matt, Tori and hopefully Elaina. I am excited for her as this is the first time she will really have some time to relax and enjoy the land that has so enamored her thoughts for so many years. I know she will worry about whether things are running properly here. However, I told her that God gave me a word for her and she is NOT to worry about anything here and there is no reason for her to be concerned about things. There is no need to hurry home, as all will be here in due time. I know her concerns are motivated by love.

After 31 years of marriage I have come to appreciate the value of time together with one person. When I was young, very young, the excitement of new and varied relationships was much more enticing. It seemed that I got bored easily and that it was much more fun to feel my heart beat fast and experience the thrill of embracing someone new as often as “appropriate.” Immaturity has a way of giving us the expectancy that the next person will be perfect in every way, because the last one certainly wasn’t! That mindset is probably why God provided Salvation and Forgiveness of Sin!!! Yes, experience is the best teacher. And, “oh my goodness” the lessons we learn from those relationships we pray for God to bless. He just smiles and says” NO, NO, NO, that is NOT the right one, no matter what you think, no matter how much you yearn for and even though you think it is what you want forever.

I, like many guys, took a bit more time to mature than perhaps I should have. Fortunately, you reach a point in life where you realize that passion for passion’s sake, excitement and the thrill of something new is not all there is to live for – because if you do, you will be continuously disappointed. Life works best with continuity and boundaries supported by deep meaningful love. A love that does not make excuses, play games, focus on selfish desires or tries to get even when mistakes are made (1 Corinthians 13.) That NEVER happens on a first encounter, months of meaningful dating or even a few years of marriage. It takes the ups and downs of marriage over years to realize that you will not change the other person, but that God has allowed your free will to choose that person because they CAN INDEED help you grow and develop into a better person than the one they married. Tracy has taught me that.

Marriage intimacy requires a firm decision that divorce is NOT an option. (Proverbs 3:3) It also requires understanding the person you are bound to has value to your maturity, regardless of what you might think on occasion. Marriage is truly a refining fire because you cannot always be right or have your own way which is truly a Godly principle. That concept illustrates the reason we are required to be obedient and not just sacrificial. I know each of you that are married will have your moments of wanting to walk away. It is the tough part of the relationship process. It compares well to our relationship with God, knowing that some will walk away from the faith (2 Peter 2:21) the way others walk away from their marriages. (I am not saying that there is NO Biblical justification for divorce. I am simply saying that some people just walk away because they don’t want to deal with the challenges of a relationship.)

Kids, you know that there will always be challenges with life. Yet, I hope you have come to realize that the Bible says that it “is not good to be alone.” Go back to the time there was a reason to love and cherish. Decide to love and don’t base it on emotion or passion. The long-term benefits far outweigh the excitement of something new. God will always make your joy full if you ask him to bless your marriage or relationships. He will open your eyes to see things you have never seen before. Just pray.

Love Dad

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *