While today may seem like just another day on the spring calendar, it was a special day in our family. It was my mom’s and dad’s anniversary. I think it is so appropriate that it fell into this section of “anything is possible” because they were truly from different sides of town, cultures and friends. However, upon exploration there were also similarities that would never meet the eye. In the depression and World War II era, who you were and where you came from was important. I believe this is one of the reasons Emily Post’s writings on etiquette took such a strong hold on our society. It was the everyman’s way of showing himself to be socially acceptable. Being a lady and gentleman, with all its protocol, meant more to my parents than I could communicate in a few short lines. While we all want to be acceptable to those around us, there are always family issues waiting to cloud our respectability.

While some may want to obscure reality, I am just enough of a realist and genealogist to know life isn’t always pretty. And, life is rarely what it seems to an outsider. So it was with both my mom and dad’s families. Before both of them had reached puberty their natural dads had deserted their families. One was never to be seen or heard from again, while the other showed up late in life, just before he died. As I grew up I had no way of knowing the pain they must have felt, the loneliness they experienced and how that emptiness impacted their life decisions. However, I do know this. They made a commitment to each other and kept it. There were times of adversity and challenge which seemingly ended it all, but somehow they found a way back to each other until their death beds parted them. Even after a brush with death, some two years after mom died, dad had no desire to be with anyone else.

Two people from different socioeconomic positions, carrying the pain of a broken family made it possible for my brother, sister and I to experience the value of long-term commitment in marriage. While there were those who were quick to comment on the challenges my parents experienced, they cannot deny that the love and devotion they shared for each other allowed them to finish their lives with honor and their children’s respect. The challenges of life, especially those inherent in marriage, are never an easy road. However, we are not judged on how we started, our status in life or what we possess. God sees us in our finished state, so the only thing that really matters is how we finish the race. Paul is a perfect example. He said in 2 Timothy 4:7 – 8: I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. ⁸Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.

Paul realized that he consented to Stephen’s stoning (Acts 7) and the persecution of Christians and because of that called himself the worst of sinners (1 Timothy 1:16). Yet, there was peace because Paul knew all things are possible with God. He knew he was finishing well was all that really mattered. So, my children, aspire to finish what you start despite the adversity you are bound to face. Finish with commitment, like Grandma and Grandpa, and you are promised the crown of righteousness.

Love Dad